Saturday, April 13, 2013

A Refreshing Day

Ahhh....

It is SO nice to be able to share that my house is CLEAN!  Granted, there may still be some things on the school table, and I think there are some jeans on the couch waiting for the boys to put away, but what really strikes me right now is the clutter - it's GONE!

Well, okay....maybe our bedroom is still a mess...but I just went up to check on Ethan (he woke up fussing) and I didn't step on one single toy!  You have no idea how miraculous that actually is.

Yep. Today was purge the upstairs day.  I've been maintaining the downstairs fairly well with the help of the Seaman girls once a week, but the upstairs had gotten WAY out of control.  It was SUCH a relief to just walk straight up the stairs, right down the hall, and into E's room without having to go through the obstacle course of toys, trash, and clothing!

Isn't it amazing how good we feel when things are clean and put in their place? When the chaos and the trash are put to order and discarded?  I will repeat it...AHHHHH!

I think there is a spiritual lesson here in this simple daily truth.  We can let things get so out of hand and clouded or we can keep them cleaned up.  We can chose to do this daily, or only when it gets so bad we can't stand it anymore.  Either way, it still needs to be done...now we just have to decide how much effort we want to put into it...a little each day or a draining amount later!

Happy cleaning!

Copyright © 2013 All Rights Reserved MMFarmlife - Melanie Schlatter

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

A Bereaved Mother - an article

A friend of mine sent me this link in an e-mail and it was just too good not to share.  I have found that so many of these statements are true.  I hope it will help someone else as it helped me.

A Bereaved Mother Is:


the woman standing in front of you at the checkout line on the verge of tears because she just dropped the jar of pickles,
the cashier who seems she could care less about her job, but had to return to work much too soon after her loss,
the woman at work who tells you she doesn’t want any kids but isn’t telling you that she’s been trying for years only to have suffered numerous miscarriages,
the woman who cries in her car because everyone in real life has grown tired of trying to ‘fix’ her pain,
the woman who finds herself jumping out of airplanes, skydiving, making spontaneous road trips because she wants to squeeze life for everything it’s got, because she knows how short time could be,
the woman at marriage counseling trying not to lose her husband too,
the woman at the tattoo parlor for the first time ever, craving a way to stay connected to her departed child,
the woman at the altar, praying a broken prayer through tears and running mascara,
the woman who wonders everyday if she will lose her other children too,
the woman who laughs to hide her pain,
the woman who hides in the bathroom at social events because something about trivial conversation is nauseating at best,
the woman who no longer recognizes herself in the mirror,
the woman who strangely feels empty and empowered all at the same time,
the woman who feels like she can conquer the world, because she’s got nothing to lose,
the grandmother who shares her losses with you, only after you’ve lost a child,
the mother of young children whose hands are constantly full of cheerios, goldfish crackers and dirt, who is always being told by others how full her hands must be, but thinking to herself not full enough’.
the woman ‘addicted’ to social media because she has finally found a community that understands her pain, and her new normal,
the woman you don’t recognize anymore,
the woman who is dancing and singing out loud, not afraid to make a fool of herself,
the woman who looks broken even when she’s smiling,
the woman who wears her heart on her sleeve,
the woman who bears her grief silently, and puts on a mask for her outside world,
the woman who make a drastic career change, what seems like to the rest of the world, on a whim,
the woman who can’t seem to put two sentences together,
one of the bravest women you will ever encounter.
The bereaved mother has lost more than most people will lose in a lifetime. Consider her pain, speak gently to her, and know that grief changes you for a lifetime.
The bereaved mother is all around you.
Aopyright © 2013 All Rights Reserved MMFarmlife - Melanie Schlatter

Monday, April 01, 2013

Counseling

Man - it has been a crazy few weeks!  I can't even get into all that has been happening here but I can share that the Farmer and I are seeking additional counseling. (I'm sure many of you will be relieved to hear that.)

We, of course, went through Bereavement Counseling with our Pastor and that was a huge help to us, but there are still so many issues that need to be addressed that don't even deal with Sarah.  In fact, the more we go along, the more we realize that the situation with Sarah only brought the other issues farther into the light.

It was suggested that we get hooked up with High Plains Mental Health out of Osborne, but neither the Farmer or I were overly comfortable going down that road yet.  Fortunately, I remembered that a friend of mine mentioned that Pastor Greg Hubbard of the E-Free Church in Smith Center did some amazing counseling.  Our Dr. (whom we hold in very high regard as he is a Christian and very compassionate in his work) had also recommended him, so I called to get more information.  We met with him and were very pleased to hear that he'd work with Dr. Overmiller to assure that we met the physical, emotional, and the spiritual needs we face.  It was such a relief walking away from that appointment with hope lingering.

Pastor Hubbard has had additional training in counseling with John Regier's Biblical Concepts in Counseling through Caring for the Heart Ministries. He is also a pastoral support for High Plains who either uses or supports the BCIC workbooks when they can.

We just finished our 4th session and still have 8 to go, in addition to a 5 half day intensive one on one session but I can say WOW!  There is so much...but it is GOOD!

(Dr. Overmiller did increase my anti-depressant too after talking to Pastor Hubbard and meeting with me to discuss how things were going. I'm so grateful they are working together!)

Well, I don't have much else to add right now, I just thought I'd update ya'all :0) Happy Day!

Copyright © 2013 All Rights Reserved MMFarmlife - Melanie Schlatter